Filed under wish I knew

Shock and awe

No, it’s definitely not as dramatic as the correct military term, but to be fair, it is as eventful for me to be in complete shock and awe about what’s been going on in 2015 so far. A while ago I did write about going for a job interview at an interior design company, where … Continue reading

Oh dear

“Oh dear.”  pretty much sums it all up. Honestly I don’t really know what to think of this weird discomfort I feel when I’m perusing for jobs. Most are just ordinary office jobs, either temp or fixed contract, and you’d think I should feel a bit more OK about it all. And yet, I can’t … Continue reading

Last of the Mohicans

There are days where I absolutely feel like the last of the Mohicans. Luckily though not like the survivors/protagonists in the movie of said title! As we speak I’m busy looking around for another gig, one that doesn’t require this absurd early rising for one, but also one that can offer a bit more of … Continue reading

No comment

October in a nutshell for me. I don’t know about you, but for one reason or another I simply can’t make myself to find the right words or the need to write them down. Plenty of thoughts and frustrations going around, don’t get me wrong on that, they still manage to linger about. Is it … Continue reading

Out loud

Now I know I have my faults and can be quite peculiar in my ways. And I know I’m many things, however I’m most definitely not a mind reader. If I’ve done something or haven’t done over the years, if you’ve never told me it bothered you I won’t know. To let it fester for … Continue reading


That little voice and or feeling that exists side by side with Doubt & Fear, though in my case Doubt definitely is far more present than Fear. Fear is more like the younger sibling, who gets dragged along whether it wants to come along or not simply because it can’t be left behind on their … Continue reading

State of affairs

It is a rather sad state of affairs if I don’t even wish to inform my mother of my very first paid commission – even if it’s a friend. Now I’m not saying this is the beginning of a string of assignments – one can only hope – but it is a start. A teeny … Continue reading

Dear Mother

I know you’d like me to have a clear and concise planning as to what my future should be. There are plenty of times where I wish I had that too, or at least a general map just so I could know what direction I preferably should and shouldn’t take. Alas life hasn’t deemed that … Continue reading

And the purpose is?

Something about “following one’s passion” manages to irk me, as if only being passionate about whatever is the key to success. But passion comes in various forms: it can burn brightly, but also burn out quite quickly if it burns too bright. It can smoulder in the background, or it needs to be lit by … Continue reading

The common denominator

As previously stated in a comment, I’m very hesitant in calling myself an artist, despite the fact a lot of the obvious facts do point in that general direction. It’s like if I call myself that, I will basically fall into that creative trap of impending doom. Not to mention, I don’t think I’ve even … Continue reading



Now that should be something that sounds familiar to society of today. It does seem the most common ambitions involve avarice to some extent. The incessant hunger for money, wealth and other materialistic things is just astounding, and I’m one of those weirdos who finds herself a bit worried by it at times. Ironically enough … Continue reading

15 minutes

Infamy infamy! They’ve all got it in for me! Fame. I’m a bit bewildered and bemused by our modern society’s desire for fame. In some cases not even a mere desire, but a real hunger. When you ask kids from a certain age what they’d want to be, quite a few of them will say … Continue reading

Sweet and delicate

Once in a while I will try to draw/paint something very delicate and cutesy. For no real reason, but wanting to give it a go. And once again find myself frustrated by it, as it seems I’m really constraining myself. I can even feel myself tensing up because of the pent-up energy. No, it seems … Continue reading

That thing called love…

Like I’ve posted on Valentine’s Day, I’m completely clueless when it comes to the matters of the heart. As a matter of fact I haven’t even been in love for too-many-years-to-count now. Sure, had a crush here or two, but the sheer definition of a crush is its fleeting nature. Nothing too serious about it. … Continue reading

Good enough

Just when exactly is something good enough? When faced with high expectations, be it your own or from those around you, this question is very much present. Is sheer perfection the only answer? Is that even attainable, or do we set ourselves up for inevitable failure? Crash and burn when you finally realise the bar … Continue reading